Breaking Social Cycles

By: Dr Carla Kesrouani June 14, 2023 no comments

Breaking Social Cycles

As children, we learn how to fit in with our social groups in order to feel accepted and validated. However, this conditioning can limit our ability to express ourselves authentically and can lead to feelings of insecurity and anxiety.

Identify Your Conditioning

The first step in breaking the social cycle is to identify your conditioning. This means recognizing the beliefs and behaviors that you learned as a child in order to fit in with your social group. Once you identify these patterns, you can begin to question them and consider whether they are serving you in your adult life.

Practice Mindfulness

Mindfulness is a valuable tool for breaking the social cycle. By practicing mindfulness, you can become more aware of your thoughts and feelings and learn to observe them without judgment. This can help you break free from conditioned patterns and make more conscious choices in your life.

Cultivate Self-Awareness

Self-awareness is essential for breaking the social cycle. By becoming more aware of your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors, you can begin to understand why you do the things you do and how they may be limiting you. This can help you make more conscious choices and break free from conditioned patterns.

Surround Yourself with Authentic People

Surrounding yourself with authentic people can help you break the social cycle. When you spend time with people who are true to themselves, it can inspire you to be true to yourself as well. This can help you break free from conditioned patterns and live a more authentic life.

Embrace Your Uniqueness

Embracing your uniqueness is essential for breaking the social cycle. When you embrace your individuality and express yourself authentically, you are less likely to feel the need to conform to social norms. This can help you break free from conditioned patterns and live a more fulfilling life.

Seek Support

Breaking the social cycle can be challenging, and it’s important to seek support when needed. This may include talking to a trusted friend or family member, joining a support group, or seeking the help of a therapist.

Socialization as Kids

As children, we absorb social norms unconsciously. We observe how others act and mimic those behaviors to fit in. For example, we may learn to:

  • Copy others’ fashion choices
  • Partake in gossip about peers
  • Suppress certain emotions
  • Develop unhealthy eating habits

While socialization is important for development, some behaviors become ingrained habits that persist into adulthood.

Impact of Social Cycles

Social cycles impact our lives in several ways. They can lead to:

  • Conformity – We go along with social norms to avoid standing out. However, this may stifle creativity and self-expression.
  • Insecurity – We rely on external validation and compare ourselves to others excessively. This breeds insecurity and unhappiness.
  • Isolation – We surround ourselves with like-minded people, creating an “echo chamber” that limits our perspectives.

Examining Social Norms

To break social cycles, we must question the norms that shape our behaviors. We can ask ourselves:

  • Are these norms beneficial, or do they cause harm?
  • How might I behave differently to be true to my values?
  • What perspectives am I lacking by conforming to this norm?

This self-examination can reveal that many social norms are arbitrary and instilled by culture rather than reason.

Making Positive Changes

Once we recognize unhelpful social cycles, we can make changes. For example, we can:

  • Practice self-expression – Wear what we like, pursue interests freely and share our authentic selves.
  • Focus on wellbeing – Base our self-worth on internal factors rather than others’ opinions.
  • Seek diverse perspectives – Build relationships with people from different backgrounds.

Breaking social cycles requires reflecting critically on norms and consciously choosing different behaviors. Though these changes may feel uncomfortable initially, they can ultimately lead to more authentic, connected and meaningful lives.

In conclusion, breaking the social cycle is essential for living a fulfilling and authentic life. By identifying your conditioning, practicing mindfulness, cultivating self-awareness, surrounding yourself with authentic people, embracing your uniqueness, and seeking support, you can break free from conditioned patterns and live a more fulfilling life. Remember, it’s never too late to break free from the social conditioning of your childhood and live the life you truly want to live.



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