Anger and Conflict Management
By: Dr Carla Kesrouani
Categories:
Anger and Conflict Management
Anger is a natural human emotion; however, dealing appropriately with it determines whether conflicts escalate or resolve. Therefore, managing anger in in productive ways facilitates addressing issues and rebuilding relationships.
Identify Triggers
Firstly, reflect on what typically provokes your anger. Common triggers include feeling disrespected, misunderstood, or overwhelmed. However, uncovering root causes requires self-awareness. Subsequently, avoid people, situations and thoughts that usually trigger anger.
Take a Breather
When anger arises, remove yourself from the situation. Count to ten and take deep breaths to calm physically. Consequently, a cooler head enables responding thoughtfully versus heatedly. Then, when ready, communicate your need for space. Honesty avoids hurt feelings.
Look for Underlying Needs
Anger often stems from unmet needs. Seek to understand needs fueling both sides. Ask what matters most to the other person. As a result, reframing issues around shared needs reveals potential solutions benefitting all.
Have a Genuine Discussion
Once emotions subside, speak from the heart. Share how the issue makes you feel without blame. Avoid defensiveness by actively listening to understand rather than form a rebuttal. Consequently, the discussion remains focused on finding workable answers.
Avoid Attack Words
Refrain from offensive language that escalates conflict. Instead, use “I feel” statements. For example, say “I feel disrespected when assumptions are made about my intentions” versus “You have no respect for me.” Consequently, you take ownership of your feelings without attacking the other party.
End with Resolution
In summary, handle conflicts productively by first managing your own anger. Identify triggers, remove yourself from the situation, and look for underlying needs on both sides. When ready, speak from the heart and listen openly. By avoiding attack words and focusing on resolution, you facilitate working through issues to rebuild and strengthen relationships.
If you or someone you know is struggling with anger issues, don’t hesitate to contact Dr Carla for effective solutions and treatment.