7 Tips to Build a Healthy Relationship with Yourself
The society we live in has set unrealistic standards to achieve in most areas including professional success, financial freedom and finally physical attributes and beauty- all of which have resulted in people struggling to accept and love themselves the way they are.
The relationship that one holds with thyself is by far the most complicated, painful but rewarding relationship ever.
We are often told to surround ourselves with positive and encouraging people and we know the impact these relationships have.
But the person that we spend the most time with, and whose voice we hear each day is our own. How we speak to ourselves and the way in which we treat ourselves is key to our wellbeing.
Check out 8 things you can do to make sure you have a good relationship with yourself.
The Importance of being your Own Best Friend
When we have a healthy relationship with ourselves, we are able to accept and appreciate ourselves for who we are, including our strengths and weaknesses.
We will also have greater self-acceptance of who we are, which can lead to greater self-esteem and confidence. This includes taking care of our physical, emotional, and mental health needs.
Moreover, when we hold a healthy image of who we are, we are more open to growth and change. We are able to recognize areas where we need to improve and take steps to develop ourselves.
We are for example better equipped to form positive and healthy relationships with others, and therefore more likely to set healthy boundaries and communicate effectively in our relationships.
And finally, when you hold a healthy relationship with yourself, you become happier because you are taking care of yourself so well, your body and mind will feel refreshed.
Going through life with this clarity relieves a lot of weight off your shoulders and opens the path towards living life with more positive thoughts and vibes.
Ways to Build a Better Relationship with Yourself
It is all in your words…
I like to highlight this section by putting it first: your inner dialogue will either lift you up or break you to pieces.
This is probably what I drill in my clients during their therapy with me with rapid Transformational Therapy. They learn the importance of paying attention to and filtering the words that come out as well as the unspoken ones.
It has been shown that there is no better and faster way to boost self-esteem and appreciate your true value than saying words of encouragement and self-praise to yourself. I like to explain it to my clients as ‘being your own best friend or your own cheerleader’.
Make it a ritual or practice to pause during your day, think of the achievement you did (big and small) and congratulate yourself for the wonderful work you’ve done. It could be remaining calm while dealing with a tough boss or your child, choosing a healthy snack alternative, or simply making the effort to go out in the sun.
You can also say positive words in the mirror every morning and evening, such as “I love who I am” and “I deserve happiness.” You may feel a little cheesy at first, but your mind will be listening, and acting upon it.
Get to know Yourself- the good And the bad!
Meet the person inside this body of yours. Learn anything and everything about you: what triggers you, what fires you up, what calms you down, ect…
Start by keeping a close eye on your environmental triggers, keeping note of what works and what doesn’t, adjusting accordingly as you’re learning. You might find that a certain type of music can dim your mood, and so you’ll learn to avoid it.
Spend time with yourself
When it’s just you and the open road, it’s easy to work on the relationship you hold with yourself. If that’s not possible, find a nearby trail with beautiful scenery so you can escape with a daily long walk for example, where you have time to reflect, set some goals, and simply ‘be with yourself’.
Practice Being Grateful for Your Body
Your body carries you, does things for you, allows you to hug your loved ones, and more. Like it or not, you’re stuck with your body for the rest of your life. Building respect for the machine that hold you together is essential. Once you stop taking it for granted, and feel grateful for all the wonderful things it does to you, the relationship you hold with your body will be one that is based on love, which will automatically generate a respectful attitude towards your body.
Research shows that people who actively practice gratitude are healthier, less depressed, and more resilient during tough times.
Let Go of Your Inner Perfectionist
Save the time you spend telling yourself you’re not good enough or trying to hide your ‘imperfections’ and instead, learn to accept yourself for who you truly are, even with the parts that you deem to be imperfect.
Keep your hobbies close
Let passion drive you. Passion makes it easier for us to lead a purpose-driven life. Research has shown that people who practice what they love are at a lower risk of suffering from depression.
Make it a point to do something that you enjoy at least once a week. It can be painting, swimming, reading, writing, calling a friend you haven’t met for some time, watching a movie you love, going on long drives, or anything else. Prioritize your joy.
Seek Professional Help
You might have tried one or most of the tips presented and still struggle with appreciating the person in you.
Dr. Carla Kesrouani can help you recognize specific issues in your life that are getting in the way to building a healthy relationship with yourself.